Modern and Modest: Connecting to God in Everyday Life

Today's Modern and Modest post features Allie, who has recently incorporated a stricter interpretation of modesty into her personal practice. Her last answer, in particular, offers an interesting challenge to modest style bloggers: "Is talking about your clothes/body all the time modest?" Read on to learn about her modesty.
  1. What does "modesty" mean to you? Why do you choose to dress modestly? Modesty means covering things I feel more comfortable not sharing with the world and showing things that I do feel comfortable sharing. This relates to clothes but also to information and other parts of my life. It's also a way for me to feel more connected to God in everyday life.

  2. What are your personal modesty restrictions? Describe a daily look. Are there places where modesty doesn't apply or situations in which the rules change (ie: your bedroom, your home, the beach, with your spouse, with family)? I generally only wear skirts (although this is more because I think pants shopping is the definition of Hell than of any modesty conviction) that cover within 2 inches or so of my knees (or longer). I cover my shoulders (ie. at least a t-shirt, no tank tops) and try not to show cleavage (although this doesn't always happen). I also wear something on my head any time I'm out of the house. The rules don't apply with just my fiancee around. I also modify one rule slightly at the beach: the shoulders one. I have a tankini with a wonderful knee-length swimming skirt and a swim cap that I wear to the beach.

  3. Do you dress in a typical style for your religious community, if you are part of one? If not, how does your style differ? How do you feel about members of your religious community who choose to dress differently? No- my religious community is notorious for not agreeing on anything, so some dress more conservatively than I do, but most dress much less so.

  4. Have your modesty standards changed over time? How so? I didn't worry much about them until a year or so ago. Since then, I started out very strict and have modified them as I go along.

  5. Do you find modesty empowering, restrictive, or somewhere in between? Is it something about which you feel passionate? Both. When it's forced, modesty is always restrictive. Also, I think, when it doesn't match up with your internal beliefs, even if it's a choice, it's restrictive. However, I think when it's a personal calling, it can be very empowering!

    [W]hen it doesn't match up with your internal beliefs, even if it's a choice, it's restrictive. However, I think when it's a personal calling, it can be very empowering!

  6. How do you balance your personal style with modesty requirements? Are the two the same? My personal style seems to gel quite well; it's the fashion industry's style that's difficult. That's why I'm learning to sew!

  7. What role does modesty play in your religious observance, if you are religious?It reminds me of the presence of God all the time and that God values my body and my soul.

  8. Do you dress in a style typical for your geographic location? If not, have you ever felt out of place or overly conspicuous because of your appearance? No-- and yes, quite often. Pretty much, the more covered I am, the more conspicuous I feel. 

  9.  What role does your spouse/significant other play in your clothing choices? Since she's still very reticent about my modesty, and my head covering in particular, I ask my fiancee's opinion a lot regarding which things she prefers on me and so on.

  10. Does blogging or reading modesty blogs strengthen, weaken or somehow alter your relationship with modesty? What has been the impact of going public with modesty?It's interesting because it brings up the question-- is talking about your clothes/body all the time modest? I still don't have an answer to that, but I enjoy thinking about it!
Interested in contributing to the series and being featured on the blog? Simply click below to fill out the survey. 


Ellyse Borghi said...

Hi Nina,

Can you tell u a little bit more about Allie? What religious community does she belong to? Is she in a same-sex relationship? Some more background information would help in understanding her answers to the survey.


Keep up the good work!

alltumbledown said...

Hi Elyse,

I provide whatever information was given to me in the survey form, so I unfortunately cannot give you complete answers. I'd assume, however, that Allie is in a liberal Christian denomination and in a same-sex relationship based on her answers (Allie, if you're reading this, we'd love to hear from you!)

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